50 Ways to Annoy the Death Note Characters
by pinkyXpookey
Summary: I know this kind of thing has been done before, but I thought it'd be fun. So here's my version! EDIT: 25 more ways have been added!
1. TEH ORIGINAL 50

**Light--**

1. Write fake love letters to L, Misa, Mikami, and Takada from him.

2. When signing his name, dot the i's with little hearts.

3. Write his last name backwards on L's and Mikami's letters.

4. Reserve a ten-minute time slot on Sakura TV. Tell him that it will be used for one of two things:

1.) Light will announce to the world that he is L's gay lover, or

2.) You will announce that Light Yagami (aka L's gay lover) is Kira.

5. Steal his Death Note before doing number 4 so he can't kill you.

6. When he's studying, sneak up on him and squeal in his ear. Loudly.

7. Crush several bags of potato chips and leave the crumbs on his bed.

**L--**

8. Call him Pandaman. Make him wear a cape. Make up a theme song and sing it whenever he enters a room and make 'whoosh' noises and flutter his cape when he passes by.

9. For his birthday, get him eyeliner.

10. For Christmas, get him socks. Cry obnoxiously until he promises to wear them. Also, make sure they don't match.

11. Bake him a bunch of cakes and cookies and whatnot, but use one of those cheap, funny-tasting substitute sweeteners instead of real sugar.

12. Give him a bowl of strawberries and a can of whipped cream. Wink at him seductively.

**Mello--**

13. Poke his belly at constant intervals. Tell him he's asking for it, showing it off like that.

14. If he gets mad, say innocently "But Matt said you like it when he does it..."

15. Ask him if he burns all the calories from the craploads of chocolate he eats by "working out" with Matt.

16. Ask him who's better in bed: Matt or Near.

17. Hide his gun.

18. Use all his chocolate to make s'mores. Offer him one, saying "You'll like them! They have marshMELLOs in them!"

19. Get him a pink, frilly training bra and tell him "It's okay that you're flat-chested; you'll fill out eventually."

20. Kiss Matt in front of him.

21. Follow him constantly with a piercing gun. Tell him that every _real _mafia member has to have something pierced. Suggest his bellybutton, since he likes to show it off so much anyway.

22. Drug him and give him a tattoo of Near while he's out cold. Preferably in an awkward location. While he freaks, 'forget' to tell him it's a temporary tattoo. **(thanks to Romp-Chan on deviantART for suggesting the second part!)**

**Misa--**

23. Record a video of yourself and a friend cosplaying as L and Light making out. Make her watch it.

24. Hand out fake wedding invitations for L and Light to random people. Don't give her one; say, "Yeah...Light said not to invite you...Too bad...Kiyomi will be there. She'll miss you..."

25. Photoshop her pictures to have 'flaws' (give her acne, make her fat, etc.). Submit them to magazines and post them on the internet.

26. Write Light's name in a Death Note. Slowly. Letter by letter, forcing her to watch.

27. Steal her Death Note before doing number 26 so that she can't kill you. Better yet, use her Death Note to kill Light. Copy her handwriting.

**Matt--**

28. Smear chocolate all over his Xbox. He'll assume Mello did it.

29. Set a hardcore MelloxNear picture as his laptop background.

30. Replace his cigarettes with those little bubblegum cigars that they hand out at baby showers. Give him one and tell him Mello's pregnant.

31. More specifically, tell him Mello's pregnant with Near's child.

32. Mistake him for a mime. Whenever he speaks, hit him and say, "Mimes aren't supposed to talk!"

33. Ask him if he thinks Mello's scar is sexy.

34. Make fun of the fact that his gun resembles a hair dryer.

**Near--**

35. Wait until one of his towers is almost complete, then scream, "OH NO, A SPIDER! KILL IT, KILL IT!" When he comes over, point to a piece of lint.

36. When he's rebuilding his tower, again, wait until it's almost done, then pull out a toy gorilla holding a Polly Pocket doll, and put it on the tower, saying "IT'S KING KONG! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Extra points if you include Near's toy airplanes.

37. Offer to do his laundry. Put pink dye in with his clothes.

38. Ask him why he grew up in an orphanage; L is quite obviously his long-lost father.

39. Cover his toys with chocolate and cigarette ashes. Blame Mello and Matt.

40. Yell "Egad! An albino! They're so rare!" Gawk at him and take pictures.

**Other characters--**

41. Aizawa: Poke his afro, then pretend to scream in pain as it devours your finger.

42. Soichiro: Stare intently at his moustache; say, "Mr. Yagami, did you know there's a caterpillar on your lip?"

43. Soichiro: Show him hardcore LxLight yaoi fanfiction and pictures.

44. Ryuk: Tell him that all the world's apple trees have died of *make up some random tree disease*

45. Takada: Sing "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne whenever she talks to Light and the name "Misa" comes up.

46. Higuchi: Show up to one of the secret Kira meetings dressed as a pizza delivery person; say, "I have a large sausage and anchovy for a Mr....Kira, is it?"

47. Rem: When she starts to write L's name in her Death Note, barge in and steal it from her and slowly, letter by letter, write Misa's name down.

48. The task force in general (except Matsuda; he'd probably like this): Play the Caramelldansen song as loud as possible while they're working on the Kira case. Get L and Matsuda to dance with you.

49. Mikami: Change the combination of the safe he has at the bank where he kept the Death Note.

and finally...

50. Everybody: Stuff the whole cast onto seperate elevators, according to who hates each other (Misa goes with Takada, Mello goes with Near, etc.)


	2. MOAR

**A/N: Here's the long-awaited second installment of my Ways to Annoy the Death Note Characters! Most of these were ideas submitted by other people, whether it was on here or on deviantART. But I took a record of their screen names as I added the suggestions. So a special thanks to those people! And to everyone who enjoyed the original 50; that's why I decided to do more ^w^**

**Oh, where it has the little "DN DN DN DN DN" breaks, that's where the segments of "I give (insert name here) credit for the following" end and the ones I came up with begin. It happens twice. I got multiple ideas from a couple of people and just decided to lump all those together in seperate segments. Just thought I'd clarify what that was.  
**

* * *

1. Light: Considering it was roughly around Christmas when he first found the Death Note, watch as he writes names down and sing "Oh, you better watch out, you better not cry. You better not pout or you're gonna die, Kira Claus is coming to town!" Then proceed to sit on his lap and ask him for a pony. With laser vision.

2. Takada: Burst into the truck with a battering ram right before she writes Mello's name down. Steal the paper from her, and write down: _Kiyomi Takada, mauled by a crazed Mello fan and a bear._ Say, "Hey, how about that, we only have to wait 40 seconds for the bear..." Proceed to tear her limb from limb.

3. (a buddy, Fundibulous teh Zohan's idea) L: Play "Thriller" by Michael Jackson on his birthday. Added touch, lock him in a room with that song/follow him everywhere with a boom box that plays said song on loop.

4. (a dA buddy, xluckystarx's idea) Matt: Ask him if he lets Mello borrow his "hairdryer gun".

5. Mello: Smack his butt. Blame Matt, even if he's not in the room. _Especially_ if he's not in the room.

6. Mello: Replace all his leather clothes with lederhosen.

7. Near: Ask him where he keeps his 'other' toys.

(I give ChipsAhoyPup credit for the following:)

8. Takada: Force her to wear a schoolgirl uniform, then lock her in a closet with Shigure Sohma (for those who don't watch/read Fruits Basket, he's famous for his high school girl fetish) for 48 solid hours. (Chips gave me the idea to change it from "room" to "closet" since it's a smaller space.)

9. Takada: Show her the videotape of Misa and Light kissing.

10. Takada: Send rabid dogs after her.

11. Misa: Chain her to a wall and force her to watch LxLight yaoi.

12. Ryuk: Give him a plastic apple.

13. Light: (Make sure he doesn't have his Death Note before you do this) Tell him you know L's real name. When he asks what it is, dance around saying you're not gonna tell him. Or keep giving him fake names.

**DN DN DN DN DN**

14. Aizawa (or Soichiro): Only communicate to him through interpretive dance. If you're doing this to Soichiro, use ballet moves and tell him you took lessons from Light.

15. (my friend Rebekkah's idea) Mello and Matt: Switch Mello's chocolate stash with Matt's cigarette stash.

16. Mello: Put his gun down Matt's pants.

17. Matt: Put his Gameboy down Mello's pants.

18. Near: Stuff a pillow, basketball, or other such item under your shirt. Pretend to "go into labor" right next to his massive, elaborate card tower, collapsing, screaming, and kicking. (Bonus points if you do this and you're a guy.)

(I give AuchanVriconella from dA credit for the following:)

19. Near: Show him MattxMello pictures.

20. Near: Put ribbons in his hair when he's asleep.

21. Near: Make him sweet tea,and put an anesthetic in it. After he falls asleep, dress him in a lolita dress, and show it to SPK team, then show it to Mello.

**DN DN DN DN DN**

22. Sayu: Sing "Sayu and Matsuda, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G..." until she slaps you. Laugh when she slaps you and continue.

23. Light: Set him up on a "blind date" with Rem. Bonus points if you take pictures without either of their knowledge, then show Misa.

24. (in reference to 23) Misa: If Rem doesn't show up in the pictures (do shinigami show up in pictures?), photoshop Takada into the pictures with Light, then show them to her.

25. Mogi: Write an opera based on his life. Sing random selections in a horribly off-key falsetto. Bonus points for wearing a horned viking hat.

* * *

**A/N: I have this great mental image in my head for #5 (Smack Mello's butt. Blame Matt...)**

**Me: *smack*  
Mello: Hey, what was that for?!  
Me: What? Matt did it!  
Matt: (from another room) What'd I do? I heard my name...  
Me: You should know! You smacked Mello's ass, you pervert!  
Matt: Oh...okay, cool, whatever (continues playing games)**


End file.
